There is a place you may, or may not have heard of called Bletchley.
This is one of those places you would usually by pass at all costs - there's nothing there of any interest, necessity, desire or other wise. It's a stagnant, smelly, flea riddled hovel of a dying town infested with multiplying rats of society.
Anyway, when my partner and I went out for lunch today (+1 Wagamama) I was informed that we would indeed be partaking in a visit to the place I mention above. First stop; Charity shop to drop off some things we've acquired from birthdays, Christmas etc. Upon first inspection Bletchley doesn't seem too awful this afternoon. Maybe it's the streaking light from the sun that is trying to escape the thick layer of cloud above. Maybe it's that most of the people have gone home to escape the cold. Either way, it seemed still and less chaotic than I remember..
Alas, the 'charm' wore off quickly and I was even more dejected to find that we were now going to the holy grail of lower class - B&N Home stores.. This place is the Mecca of cheap cleaning products and discounted soft drinks. Whilst quickly crossing the car park to the entrance I am quizzed by a youth and his 'beautiful' partner if I have a phone he could 'use', or could I call a cab for him as it hasn't arrived.. (Not sure how he called one in the first place but what do you do.) Of course, I'm not going to hand him my phone so I proceed to chase this taxi for him, which before I've even got through the conversation with the lady at the other end, arrives for them to return home in.
20 mins later and a sweaty brow we proceed to the checkout to finally pay for our Jam creams, toilet brush, shampoo, hand wash, and tissues. The total price - £12.80.
I'm home. I feel safe. I needed a cup of tea and a jam cream.
I don't wish to go back anytime soon.